Hello dear friend. This isn’t the normal holiday home tour. It’s one that comes with a little story of the heart. A story about how it feels to long for something even in the most wonderful time of the year. More than anything it’s about finding peace at Christmastime.
Yes, it’s the most wonderful time of the year. Going into this holiday season I felt melancholy. Missing our old house, our dear friends and neighbors. Decorating a new space is always challenging and our Christmas decorations didn’t seem to work. Our tree was too big, our house was too small, there was no mantel for the stockings. (You know, first world problems.) Many of our ornaments were broken, we discovered as we were unboxing them. I sat down watching the new Grinch with the girls and realized that maybe my heart was the thing that needed some adjusting.
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I think it’s common to long for what once was, especially around the holidays. Something about the nostalgia of Christmas brings back so many memories that I would like to relive. I often wish we could experience one more day when my children were babies or one more chat on the phone with a loved one who’s gone from this Earth. Lately, I’ve been longing for one more sleep in the old house or one more late night with our treasured neighbors.
I missed desperately decorating the mantel that Matt built and hanging real garland from all the doorways in our home.
In attempts to pull me out of a funk and shove myself into the holiday spirit; I ordered a new tree, I rustled up the ornaments that were usable, put on some Christmas music, and got to work decorating our home for Christmas. Moving is always hard for our family (even when we know it’s coming) and even when your space feels settled sometimes the heart does not.
As we decorated our family tree, pulling out special ornaments from places we’ve been or milestones we’ve celebrated, I started to feel the goodness of the season. My heart was filled with joy because of our adventures not in spite of them.
It’s not always easy. It’s sometimes very hard but there are little pockets of light throughout our journey that make it seem so doable, even exciting, and that keeps me going. Things like my girls’ faces lighting up at the sight of our Christmas tree and their excitement about the first Christmas in their new house. Those moments are treasures.
If you are in a place of longing for what was, or perhaps still unsettled in what’s new, I encourage you to lean into it, even if it’s uncomfortable. That’s when the magic happens.
Happy holidays, friend.